Blogs, Chickens, and Yarn Pyramids

Oh my darling bloginites! How I have missed all of your wonderful IP addresses! Just kidding I am not that smart (or am I). I have however missed bitching about everything I can think of- and that is why I think most of you read this.  Not to hear me bitch but to relate.... or maybe you just like to listen to someone else have a miserable life so you feel better about yours. Who knows- but I do know you ended up here one way or another and that is why I will continue to type away.

I have also decided to put a spin on things here on the farm.  I think I might supplement some days with a vlog entry. And who doesn't like a little one on one action with the face? You take that anyway you want to.  But in all seriousness some days I don't have time to type up a long little blobby post so yelling at my camera sounds better.  Today you get a little taste of that down at the bottom.  Whoa innuendos all around today.

So the fiance and I have been discussing the house situation for when he gets back from his little overseas adventure.  We aren't buying a house until he gets back so we have plenty of time to discuss what we want and what we can afford blah blah.  And so far my input has been nil to not helpful at all.  I have decided we will be having chickens at our house.  Come on how amazing would that be? Fresh eggs all the time and really on the level of ease, chickens are not nearly as expensive as lets say a cow or horse.... although I would kill for those animals too.  But I am being realistic for what we can actually raise.  I also keep joking (not joking) about bringing them inside to relax with us.  He totally thinks I am not being serious- but I half expect him to find me in the mudroom one day hanging out with the chickens. A little mama love with the poultry.  I also want a goat- we can name him Billy Bob.  He also thinks I am kidding about this. I don't think he realizes who he is marrying.

Some of you who have been here on the farm for awhile now (catching on that that is what i am calling this place yet?) know I am an avid knitter.  I believe I mentioned the giant blanket I was knitting the fiance.  If not then- hey! I knit my fiance a huge blanket and now I am going to show you! Hahaha, very subtle am I right?

He is such a wonderful model- am I right?

I also managed to knock out my nephew a hat right before the holidays as an added Christmas present.  I thought the sizing would be perfect since he grows like a weed- but he might need another year before his noggin fits into this bad boy.  The sizing was for kids so I guess I shouldn't be disappointed he can't sport my work quite yet.  

His mom has the inverted version of this hat as well.

And now my current project has resulted in a pyramid of yarn in the corner of my room.  I know, my adiction is getting so great it is taking up space in rooms.  It's almost like hoarding.  But you know you have a problem when you and the fiance are sitting at Michael's and you ring up $180 worth of yarn and between your rewards points and coupons you get it all for $50.  Sad part about this is I still need more yarn for this project. Yes you heard right- this project is going to need about 26 skeins of yarn annnnnd I only have 18.  Oh yay.  But I figured I should dwindle down the pyramid before I start a second one... or before the fiance actually stats to object to my giant yarn piles.  

Its chunky yarn- that is why I need so much.

But enough is enough my darlings. I have a giant blanket to get to knitting.  But I will leave you with my tidbit of vlog just like I promised. Go pour yourself some wine and drink up- I am currently sipping some Relax Riesling from you guessed it, a mason jar.  Stay classy my darlings. 

Obsessive Christmas Disorder

Okay I will admit I am a bit insane when it comes to Christmas. I start planning in August for who is getting what and how I am going to afford it all. But this Christmas it seems that I am not nearly as excited and my family seems to think I am.  This is the first Christmas with the new boy, and we are nearing a year together so the meshing of the holidays is still new.  However I am getting more and more stressed over this the closer it gets.  His family is very set in their ways, and I am not feeling the love from them.  Not that I should- we aren't particularly close.  But I am nervous that I am going to seem as more of a road block to their plans than a welcome addition.

Has anyone else had this?  Maybe it is because I am self conscious about being a young, single mother.  I am constantly thinking I am being judged by people and I don't want to come off as an ignorant and- oh I am not even sure how to phrase this.  His family has appeared to be welcoming of this little addition- but I do not want to come in and become cozy when I shouldn't.  

My family alone has a ridiculous amount of Christmas celebrations.  Divorced family means we had to adapt and make lots and lots of holidays. Now we add in theirs? Not to mention they overlap.  So who's do we chose?  His family already feels I pull him away too much... so I don't want to miss his- but I truly don't feel welcome at his.  

Ultimately I want to keep my daughter where she will feel the most comfortable- and that leads to my house, my mothers house and his house. Only time will tell I suppose.  He has been nothing but supportive of this entire blending and I know it is a work in progress.  All families blend at some point and traditions change. I guess I have always thought it would be a little bit less harsh than a straight shot of vodka.  

Testing for paramedic school is in less than two weeks and I can't contain my anxiety.  I keep telling myself I will be okay and I an do this- and it is not the paper test I am worried about.  I always get nervous when it comes to practicals, and of course there is one for entrance to this program.  I can not tell you of much it makes me want to curl into a ball over it.  13 days and I hope my lucky stars are aligned and I can keep my cool long enough to get in.  I had overwhelming support from people in their letters explaining that they have confidence in me to do this- so why don't I? 

Lord where did my back bone go? Better go find it. I am definitely going to need it.  But until then- I am going to finish watching this game 7 of the world series.  Die hard Cubs fan here! Go Cubs Go!