Coexistence...

It's been awhile!  I know I am epicly sucking at writing posts these days.

As you know, the ex and I live together with a roommate. It's like one big bachelor pad. Or a frat house, depending if you look in our pantry or not.  But can the opposite sexes really be just friends?  Most people's automatic response is no. However, why is that?  We coexist in many places, the workplace, schools, heck even gas stations and grocery stores.  But is that because we're only briefly near each other?  Is this platonic experience just a facade, an elaborate dance covering up countless sexual impulses bubbling just beneath the surface?  

Part of this confusion stems from the media.  A certain classic film starring Meg Ryan and Billy Crystal  convinced the nation of moviegoers that sex always comes between men and women, making true friendship impossible.  Television hasn't helped much either.  Almost every classic show has one couple whom you wait and wait for the sexual tension to break, and for them to end up together.  And ultimately romance occurs and everyone is happy.  Come on, think about it.  Monica and Chandler, Meredith and Derrick Sheppard, even Sam and Diane.

But I think the key to it all, is whether you have clearly defined that you are just friends.  Think about it.  There is always that guy who claims he got led on.  Maybe he did, or maybe he never even implied he wanted more.  If you don't know where that line is, then who is he to claim she crossed it?  Furthermore, those guys who claim to get "friend zoned," did they ever say that they wanted more?  And when they did speak up was it too late?

Side note here, (sorry random thoughts pop up in my head and I can't stop them) if these guys got friend zoned, doesn't this just prove the fact that opposite sexes can be friends?  Or at least attempt to be friends?  Just saying....

But the biggest problem that comes between the just friends stigma, is the sexual attraction.  A simple hug could take on more than you're implying.  A normal hug, for just a little bit longer could send a mind on overdrive.  Let's face it, they have one half and we have the other and it would be really convenient to just slip and let it happen.  But if you have set those boundaries to a "no fun extras" kind of relationship then obviously you can't just give in.  That doesn't mean those feelings aren't going to pop up here and there, and most the time they aren't welcome.  You just have to swallow them and move on from them, if you really want that friendship to work.

Basically, if you have the will power, you can be friends with the opposite sex.  It's not a matter of "how our minds are wired" or any other bullshit reason you throw at me.  I honestly lost my entire train of thought.... so I'm just going to give up now.